the BLOPE

Dealing with teenagers is never easy. It is also time consuming. SO we put together 3 very quick tips for keeping your cool, when you are about to blow your lid.  1) Pray this short prayer first: “God give me grace in the moment” . It is impossible to maintain control of your emotion apart from the grace of God, so be willing to ask for it. 2) Ask yourself, “What can I teach them right now?”  This thought will keep you focused on the greater parenting task which is teaching them the beliefs and life skills they need to become an adult. 3) Consider the context.  What physical changes could be causing this behavior? What relational pressures or circumstances might be fueling your teenager’s emotional response? That is it. Obviously, these things can only go so far but next time you feel like you are about to react in a negative way, just remember: Pray, Teach, Context. 

What is the difference between Reacting and Responding? Actually there is a huge difference. If you and I can understand that difference we can build bridges instead of walls in our relationships with teenagers.  This month’s online parenting class is focused on helping you as a parent learn some tips to “Respond” to your teenager in a healthy way. I want to start by sharing a great example from an experienced mom of teenagers: It was my favorite lip gloss! Burt’s Bees (the tinted one, no less) is not exactly cheap. And did I mention it was my favorite? What could she possibly have been thinking? Every sane person knows that when lip balm is left in a warm car, it tends to get soft. So what would possess her to twist it till it was all the way up and then try to push it back down into the tube? Really? Of course it split right down the middle. This would have been the perfect time to teach my teen the difference between reacting and responding. I failed. Aga...

Hey Parents! As you may know, we have been meeting online with students through Zoom meetings. I want to give you a brief introduction into setting up an account for your student. This is where we are doing our Digital Hangouts (EVERY weekday @12:45 pm) and boot ONLINE (Sundays @5:30 PM) with students. These meetings are password protected and as the host, I will have full access to mute students’ video or audio, allow students to join the group, and the group will end when  I exit the meeting. It is a safe way for our group to meet and allows us to continue to build our community. To Join: • Go to  bcsm513.com  and click on the appropriate link (either Digital Hangout or Boot). • A tab will open up and a download will start for the Zoom program. • Once downloaded, a screen will pop up to prompt you to put in a password. If you do not have the password yet, message me and I will get it to you. • After that, a screen will pop up to prompt you to allow video and a...

Deuteronomy 6:4-9 gives us our mission from God as parents: “Hear O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one. Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. These commandments that I give you today are to be on your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates.” I want to quickly unpack this job description for parents into 3 action steps that you can do today to begin passing down faith in your home: 1) Put it in your Heart First - “these commands…are to be on your hearts” You can’t give away what you don’t have. You can’t inspire someone else to do something unless it inspires you first. If you want your teenager to be fueled by their faith than make sure that is what is fueling you. ACTION STEP: ...